I Give You Permission
By Z Zoccolante
There are so many times in life that we start over . . .
He said that he never felt like he could really be himself, that he was always looking to the adults to tell him what he should do, could do, but where was his own voice. He said he never had the strength to follow it until the voice got soft and hid inside, out of reach. We all want to live our truth and share it bravely, unabashedly.
She said that she didn’t realize how she disrespected other women because she wanted so badly to be loved by all men to make up for the missing links in her childhood. She saw no problem with this, didn’t understand why women looked at her the way they did as she slid into the room. Until later when she watched younger women embody the same missing pieces and try to fill them with the wrong things. We all want to know our value through our own eyes but often settle for it through the eyes of someone else in momentary fragments.
He said he wanted to badly to connect with women but no one showed him how. And he was all insecurity and holes of confidence with stories of deep embarrassment and shame. But in exploration there were so many missed connections in which he ignored the thing he wanted most because of fractures in his sense of self. We all just want to be loved and to connect and have moments of bliss with each other.
She said she cried for three years when he left, that she didn’t leave her house, that she was a zombie. That even though she saw therapists and friends there was a black hole inside her heart. But then one day she said enough and consciously decided not to cry for someone that has ripped himself from the life they shared. And it was then she embraced her childlike joy and began to live young again, free. We all want this freedom, when given the chance to start over what will make of this new open path.
There are so many times in life we get the chance to start over. Sometimes everything has fallen apart, sometimes we choose to walk away from things that no longer serve us. Underneath all our differences we all pretty much want the same things. For all of us that were not given permission, as kids or as adults, I give you permission now…
To pursue your dreams, to speak your truth, to do the things that fill you with joy, to say screw it to what others think about any way that you choose to live your life, to follow the things that make you smile and light up your life, take the job that fills your wings with freedom but has less security, travel to that place you’ve always wanted to go,
approach that person and have that conversation, laugh with your mouth wide open, be playful, discover the thing that brings you joy and do more of that, respect each other, treat others with compassion, have the intention of the highest good for all,
take care of yourself first, love and keep your heart open,
because the truth is that nothing is promised. This set future we think we have is nothing more than a hypothesis. Everything can change. Why not be happy now. Why not live the life that you’d want to live if you knew that your time was limited here . . . because it is.
I give you permission. I give you permission. I give you permission.
Now go and live your best life full of joy. Take care of yourself. Take care of each other.