Moving Through the Quicksand Emotion
By Z Zoccolante
Once upon a time, which is this time in my life, I was having a hard time emotionally releasing a person who I’d recently stopped contact with. One morning I woke up and this person was my first thought, and then I spiraled down an angry spiral and began to shame myself and get down on myself.
I’m a therapist, I “should” be better at letting go, was one of my unkind thoughts I told myself as I metaphorically pointed fingers at myself as I drove along the coast to work.
A friend tells me to try Ho’oponopono, and I think, duh, I walk my clients through this all the time and yet how is it that it completely slipped my mind to do it myself.
So, I do the process and it creates space. And yet I find my thoughts still spin a bit. And then I talk to God.
Dear God. What’s up with this? How do I clear it for good?
God tells me it’s because I allow myself indecision.
Say more God.
He says that I know what to do. Walk away. He says it’s like quicksand.
Say more God.
He tells me that it’s like going on an adventure in the jungle and I step in quicksand and I sink and there’s two pages or two minutes of the movie on how I get out. Whatever. Then I’m out of the quicksand.
Once I’m out of the quicksand I don’t say, “Oh how I miss being in the quicksand. I feel bad for the quicksand. Maybe I should go back to the quicksand.”
NO, you move on into the forest because you’re on an adventure. Once that experience is done it’s done and you can move on from it so that you can be present for the rest of your journey.
He says that anything from our past is like quicksand and we’re not made to live in the past. We’re made to move forward, like a movie, like a book. We can make a map of the terrain, like oh yeah, there was quicksand there, but we glance at the map and then focus on where we are heading. We focus on the rest of the path.
Just because you stepped in quicksand earlier on your journey it doesn’t mean anything about you. Going back to try to see if you can make it mean something different is silly.
It’s quicksand. Move forward. That can be your immediate decision. There’s so much more of the journey ahead. Turn the page. Adventure.