While I’m crying, he calmly fixes my tire.

Wait, that comes later . . .

Today’s been chaotic on the highways of LA. I’ve spent longer driving to my meetings than the time we actually met. I haven’t written yet – because it’s highly unsafe while driving, and frowned upon during meetings.

Within my car, there’s a general aura of stress and blahness.

I have dinner plans with a friend but I’m running late so I must go straight to the restaurant. I take a deep breath as my CD player shifts discs. My phone rings: My sexy husband. I swing by his work to drop something off.

“What’s wrong with your tire?” he says.

“What do you mean,” I ask, skipping all greetings and going straight to grouchy.

“It’s flat.”

“No, it’s not.”

He gives me the clearly I’m not mechanical look.

A nail has found a home in my tire.

He takes the keys from me. I don’t put up a fight as I slither into the passenger’s seat feeling victimized by a tiny piece of steel.

He proceeds to methodically remove items from the trunk, locate the jack, and lift the wheel.

I hand over a wrench, feeling sorry for myself.

He works efficiently and without emotion.

“How do you know how to do all this?” I say. “ I feel like such a stupid girl.”

A lug nut lies in his open palm. “I was an airplane mechanic. This isn’t hard.”

“But it’s hard to me,” I say, sounding like a five year old. “How are you so calm about it?” I plop myself down on the ground like a ball of goo.

“What am I supposed to do,” he says, “It needs to be fixed so I’m fixing it.”

I brush a tear away with the back of my hand.

“It’s just a tire,” he says. “It’s not the end of the world.”

*

Today my kryptonite is a centimeter of steel, which leaves ME crying in the parking lot, while HE calmly fixes the tire.

This is what I learn:

1) It’s just a tire.

How many things in life do I treat like they are the end of the world, when they’re only a silly little tire? (Ask yourself the question out loud)

2) Not everything is my skill set, but I can learn.

Yes, working on airplanes definitely gives my husband the upper hand fixing the tire. But I can write a story about it. My skill set to date isn’t math or engineer friendly, but it doesn’t mean I can’t learn. I’m a smart individual, and let’s be honest, if my life depended on it, I’m certain I could figure out how to change a tire.

3) Don’t be a MeaniePoo, but do lead your awesome parade.

The world is full of people that may judge you or be mean to you, don’t be one of them. If you don’t think you’re awesome, why would others? Instead, be your number one fan! Be the first one on your side. Stop judging yourself and instead be the leader of your personal awesome parade.

4) Focus on your strengths. But first, define strength correctly.

In the article (Discover Your Strengths and Supercharge Your Business) Simone states that our strengths are not what we’re good at, but rather the activities that give us energy and make us feel strong.

My husband likes fixing things. I love painting pictures with words. My husband’s hell would be writing all day, and mine would be a job tinkering with machines or technology.

We all have our thing. Find and do work you LOVE. Find someone else to do what drains you. It may be what fills them up.

5) Everybody is a genius at something.

I love this quote from Einstein:

 “Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”
– Einstein

6) Take care of yourself.

If I’d had a great day of writing or playing in nature, the flat tire might have caused nothing more than a shrug. However the stress of my day had been compiling for hours till one tiny detail caused the whole mountain to collapse. Stress makes us vulnerable.

Address stress with sporadic self-check-ins. Call a friend. Take regular breaks including changing body postures and locations. If in your car, listen to music you love or audibly list everything you’re thankful for.

Remember: You’re a genius. You’re awesome. You’re capable of great things. Take loving care of yourself. Focus on the thing you’re obsessed with and that recharges your batteries. Stop judging yourself for not being a jack-of-all-trades. We all know how that sentence ends . . . master of none.

With Love,

Z :)

Especially if you’re a writer, check out my latest publication this week:
6 Ways to Resuscitate Your Novel. Here